Is there a secret formula to make a man stay in a relationship? The truth of the matter is there is no fixed 1-2-3 guide that a woman can follow to make sure that her partner will stay with her the rest of her life. Men and women are not just biologically different from each other. They also have different mindsets and different ways of looking at and dealing with their relationships.
Because we live in a world where there are so many personality variations, it is very difficult to get the right combination that will work. The right partnership between a man and a woman should be something that provides each partner optimum happiness, where one can not be complete without the other. However, more often than not, this sense of happiness becomes an illusive dream. We see too many people ending up disillusioned with their relationships or constantly struggling to make them work.
An interesting study shows that men leave relationships more often than women do. This is somewhat related to another study that says about 60% of men will at one point or another cheat on their girlfriends or wives.
So what are the most common reasons men leave the women they vowed to love? Here are just a few:
1. She's constantly trying to change me.
When a relationship is just starting, it is easy not to see each other's imperfections. However, after the honeymoon phase is over, a woman may start thinking, "I'd be much happier if only he'll be more...." It is quite common for some women to "fix" their men to fit their idea of perfection. Is this impossible to achieve? I don't think so! I've seen many men who would give up a vice or something that irritates their women, and also other men who had completely been "reformed" from their bachelor days. The secret there is to make your man understand that the change will benefit his life. If you use threats or emotional blackmail so that your guy will change as you demand, you are only giving him a good reason to leave.
2. She takes up too much of my time, always wanting me to be there for her.
At the start of a relationship, it may be flattering to a man's ego to know that he is your "hero" who would cater to your every whim and need. However, your man may get exhausted with your constant whining for attention that he'll feel your emotional dependency on him is crippling the relationship.
Unknowingly, you may be driving your man away when you declare that your happiness is his and only his responsibility. Your partner will sooner or later realize that the relationship is one sided, and he'll grow tired trying to constantly please you.
3. She's always putting me down.
Put yourself in his shoes. You wouldn't want to be frequently reminded that you fall short of somebody else's expectations, would you? You may just be focusing on his negative sides that you no longer see the good side of him that you fell in love with in the first place.
Remember that it is human nature to want to be in an environment of love and appreciation. If your man only hears you talking about what's wrong with him, then don't be surprised to see him "retreat to himself" or worse, to simply leave one day.
4. She's become boring.
Too often men fall into the lure of other women because their girlfriends or their wives had become somewhat too familiar to them. The thrill of the chase is gone; there is nothing new and exciting in the relationship anymore. That's why it's always important to keep improving yourself and making yourself interesting to your man. It also means finding ways to share fun, laughter and adventure.
5. She's freaking me out.
There can be so many versions to this, but what's common, I believe, is when your man just feels too suffocated to continue with the relationship. If he can not find a good reason to stay, then he won't stay.
If he doesn't see the relationship adding any value to his life, he will not see it as something he needs or "can't live without".
What would help to make your man stay is to keep the communication open and assess whether you both are doing your best to keep the relationship happy.
Don't deny the possibility, though that your man left or is about to leave because of one simple reason - he is just that not into you in the first place! If that's the case, then you can either work on making him fall in love with you first or start the process of letting him go.
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